How to get a guy to find you attractive
Eavesdrop on any pre-date pep talk, and you'll probably hear the typical woman-to-woman dating advice: Play it cool, do your hair like this—and whatever you do, don't wear that. But while those traditional tips aren't necessarily wrong, there are other, way more important traits that research shows men find attractive—and they have nothing to do with your physical appearance. The problem: Traditional dating advice has been leading us on a wild goose chase, one that leads away from the possibility of real, healthy love, says Ken Page, the author of Deeper Dating. Relationships are built on authenticity and connection, he explains. And the best news? You probably already have them.SEE VIDEO BY TOPIC: 7 Subtle Signs You're More Attractive Than You Think - Alex Costa
- 10 Simple Ways To Immediately Be More Attractive To Your Man
- 9 Pro Tips on How To Be Irresistible to Men – Men Will Go Crazy
- 17 science-backed ways men can appear more attractive to women
- 5 Scientific Tips on How to Be Attractive to Men
- Lust Is Complicated, But Studies Show These 19 Things Make Men More Attractive to Women
- Beauty and the geek: Scientifically proven ways to become more attractive to men
- 13 Things A Woman Can Do To Be More Attractive To Men
10 Simple Ways To Immediately Be More Attractive To Your Man
George Clooney. It's almost Valentine's Day, and for many, the pressure is on to find that special someone. We've rounded up some of the most compelling scientific insights, so you can step up your game. Rutgers University anthropologist and best-selling author Helen E.
As she shared at Psychology Today , it goes like this:. First the woman smiles at her admirer and lifts her eyebrows in a swift, jerky motion as she opens her eyes wide to gaze at him. Then she drops her eyelids, tilts her head down and to the side, and looks away. Frequently she also covers her face with her hands, giggling nervously as she retreats behind her palms.
This sequential flirting gesture is so distinctive that [German ethologist Irenaus] Eibl-Eibesfeldt was convinced it is innate, a human female courtship ploy that evolved eons ago to signal sexual interest. Men — and women — are attracted to people who are as attractive as they are.
In one study , for example, researchers at the University of California at Berkeley looked at the behavior of 60 male and 60 female users on an online dating site.
While the majority of users were inclined to reach out to highly attractive people, they were most likely to get a response if that person was about as attractive as they were as judged by independent raters. If they are much less attractive, you are worried that you could do better.
In , University of North Carolina sociologist Glen Elder found that looks and wealth tend to find one another — namely, good-looking women tended to settle down with less attractive but wealthier men. Why the attraction to resources? Psychologists call it the " George Clooney Effect. While some claim that the beard trend is over, the research says it's not. In a Australian study, researchers had men and women look at images of 10 men in one of four conditions: clean-shaven, light stubble, heavy stubble, or full beard.
Dixson and Robert C. It only takes a bit of maintenance to keep that day beard all the time. But Frederick and Haselton took away another telling finding: Less-muscular men were thought to be a better fit for long-term relationships. So if you want to catch a woman's eye and hold her attention, you may be better off building some muscle but not going overboard. One of the most robust findings in psychology is the halo effect, a bias where you unconsciously take one aspect of somebody as a proxy for their overall character.
It's why we think beautiful people are good at their jobs, even when they aren't necessarily. But as psychologist and writer Scott Barry Kaufman at Greater Good notes, the halo effect works in other ways too.
In a Chinese study , more than young men and women looked at images of other men and women's faces and rated them on attractiveness. Each face pictured was paired with a word that described either a positive personality trait — like kindness or honesty — or a negative personality trait — like being evil or mean. A cross-cultural study — with participants from China, England, Germany, and the US — found that women are most attracted to men wearing red.
In one experiment featured in the study, 21 female undergrads looked at a black-and-white picture of a man against either a red or white background, and then rated the man's attractiveness.
Sure enough, the man was rated significantly more attractive when he was pictured against the red background. The results were similar when researchers compared the red background to other color backgrounds as well. Wearing red may work for women , too. Then that man was instructed to approach the woman and ask for her number. After the man left, an experimenter approached the woman and asked her to rate the man on attractiveness and intelligence and to indicate how much she would want to date the man long-term.
In a experiment , Israeli women read vignettes about men. Some of the men were described as "cads": They would cheat on their partner and get into fights. The other men were described as stereotypical "dads": They would work hard at their job and take good care of their kids.
Whenever the story featured a cad who owned a dog, women rated that man as a more suitable long-term partner than a cad who didn't own a dog. Cads with dogs were even rated slightly more attractive than dads with dogs. The researchers concluded that owning a pet signals that you're nurturing and capable of making long-term commitments. It can also help you appear more relaxed, approachable, and happy. Not into pet ownership?
The good news is simply being seen with a dog can make you seem more dateable. If you're not musically inclined, simply holding an instrument could help you score a date. A study found that men who approached women and asked for their number were more successful when they carried a guitar case, as opposed to a gym bag or nothing at all. Australian researchers recently studied undergrads participating in a speed-dating session, and found that mindful men tended to receive higher attractiveness ratings from women.
Before the session began, 91 students were asked to fill out a mindfulness questionnaire in which they indicated how much they agreed with statements like, "I perceive my feelings and emotions without having to react to them. Results showed that men were generally more drawn to physically attractive women. Independent coders had rated the students' attractiveness beforehand. But women were generally more attracted to mindful men. A study led by researchers at the University of Alaska at Anchorage found that women are attracted to men who take what the researchers call "hunter-gatherer risks.
Hunter-gatherer risks included mountain biking, deep-sea scuba diving, and extreme rollerblading. Low- and no-risk behaviors included biking along paved paths and carefully handling chemicals in a chemistry-lab class.
Results showed that women said they would be more attracted to men who engaged in hunter-gatherer risks — the kinds that were similar to risks faced by ancestral humans. Women said they would be less attracted to men who engaged in modern risks, which might seem just plain dumb.
Simply knowing that you're wearing a new fragrance can make you act more confident , and even make you seem more attractive to other people. Over the next few days, the men who used the scented spray reported higher self-confidence and felt more attractive. The researchers determined that the men using the scented spray displayed more confident behavior, which in turn made them more attractive. For the next 12 hours, the men wore cotton pads under their armpits and were instructed not to use any deodorants or fragrances.
About 30 women looked at a picture of a man with a brief description of his hobbies, which sometimes included volunteer work. The same procedure was repeated with about 30 men looking at a picture of a woman. Everyone rated how attractive they found the person pictured for a short- and long-term relationship. Both genders rated the person pictured as more attractive for a long-term relationship when they were described as altruistic — but the effect was stronger for women rating men.
That scar on your chin from when you fell off your bike as a kid? It could help you attract a mate. In a study , researchers took photos of 24 male and 24 female undergrads and digitally manipulated half of them so they appeared to have facial scars. Then they recruited another group of about male and female undergrads to rate all the people pictured on attractiveness, for both short- and long-term relationships. Results showed that men with scars appeared slightly more attractive for short-term relationships than men without scars.
Women, on the other hand, were perceived as equally attractive regardless of whether they had scarred faces. Account icon An icon in the shape of a person's head and shoulders.
It often indicates a user profile. Login Subscribe Subscribe. My Account. BI Prime Intelligence Logout. World globe An icon of the world globe, indicating different international options. Shana Lebowitz and Drake Baer. Look for the universal signals of flirtation. Look for someone "in your league. Present yourself as high status.
Look older. Grow a light beard. Build muscle but not too much. Be kind. Wear red. Make your partner laugh. Walk a dog. Play good music. Practice mindfulness. Play extreme sports carefully. Wear a scented deodorant. Chow down on garlic. Do volunteer work. Show off your scars. Attraction Relationships Dating.
9 Pro Tips on How To Be Irresistible to Men – Men Will Go Crazy
The best part? We're talking small tweaks, like acting nicer and swapping your deodorant. Rutgers University anthropologist and best-selling author Helen E. Fisher says that women around the world signal interest with a remarkably similar sequence of expressions. As she shared at Psychology Today , it goes like this:.
I have read my share of Thought Catalog in the past few months, and it seems like men have really tiptoed around the subject of holding women to some kind of a standard. So, here is yet another listicle for our wonderful readership. We want to be aroused by the sight of you being naked. People can argue the pitfalls of the BMI scale all they want, but for the average Jane, it works just fine. I suggest times a week of cardio-esque activity.
17 science-backed ways men can appear more attractive to women
Many of us think that attraction or liking someone is purely subjective, however, social psychologists have shown that there are five key factors that can significantly increase your chances of attracting men. You can be more successful at attracting men if you enhance some or all of the factors above. However, we all do. Social psychology studies show that we sub-consciously associate physically attractive people with positive traits including kindness, honesty, and intelligence. We may not realize that we are doing this, and we may even deny it, but tests show attractive people are viewed more favorably than their less attractive counterparts. Attractive and well-groomed people are more likely to create a good impression during job interviews, they are more likely to get votes in an election, they are more likely to receive help, and have a greater ability to change someones opinion. The only case where this does not hold is when both women are in direct competition with each other, for example when vying for the attentions of the same man. Get your hair styled professionally, because whatever your friends may tell you, scientific studies show that physical attractiveness matters.
5 Scientific Tips on How to Be Attractive to Men
How to attract a man that you like and how to attract men in general is such a big topic that I get asked about constantly by women. I am sure you have come across a woman like this, who somehow effortlessly has men wildly attracted to her. And not just any men…. Well, in this article I will take you through some of the most common and universally applicable things you can do to make yourself more attractive to men and attract the man you want.
You get the point. Flirting is a huge part of learning how to attract men. Get proven techniques that thousands of women have already successfully used in my Flirting Workshop.
Finally, scientific studies we can actually use! We scoured the medical and scientific journals to find studies that would help us in the dating world. So smile, wear red, laugh at all his jokes and check out all the other proven ways to become more attractive—tell us which ones worked for you! No dress?
George Clooney. It's almost Valentine's Day, and for many, the pressure is on to find that special someone. We've rounded up some of the most compelling scientific insights, so you can step up your game. Rutgers University anthropologist and best-selling author Helen E. As she shared at Psychology Today , it goes like this:.
Lust Is Complicated, But Studies Show These 19 Things Make Men More Attractive to Women
OK, here's the truth: Not all men are born with good looks and charm. In fact, lots of guys are born with neither. But does that mean you're fated to spend your life alone in your apartment, with only Netflix and your dog to keep you company? Absolutely not. The truth is that while looks do matter to men and women alike, it's far from the most important thing when it comes to finding a partner. The science of sexual attraction is a complex one that involves multiple different factors, from the way you smell to the shape of your jaw to even the color of the shirt you're wearing.
Physical stuff. Well, let us tell you about more than those three things that guys find themselves inexplicably drawn to although, full disclosure: we have included a couple physical attributes as well, because biology. For example, did you know that guys are actually really attracted to your ability to communicate? Well, according to Psychology Today, the opposite is true for men! For them, they perceive women with higher voices to be younger, more feminine, and even thinner!
Beauty and the geek: Scientifically proven ways to become more attractive to men
Updated: April 9, Reader-Approved References. Contrary to popular belief, it takes more than a pretty face and a nice figure for a man to find you attractive. Studies have shown that while physical attractiveness is certainly important, your personality is even more important than how you look.
13 Things A Woman Can Do To Be More Attractive To Men
This is simply a common situation that most couples find themselves in after being together for a few years. You might begin to take each other for granted. Small, unprocessed arguments start to stack up and resentment quietly builds, like a subtle din in your partnership. Like anything worth having, getting the spark back is going to require a bit of effort.